After my nap, my mom asked me to accompany her to the grocery store to again find some alcohol, canned goods and frozen food to help us "survive" the lockdown.
We arrived at 5:00pm and the Security Guard stopped us at the door and asked for our Quarantine Pass.
We said, we didn't have any and we have no idea where to get it and how come they are asking for a quarantine pass. It's just a grocery not an an airport.
While talking to the guard, I remember the men who were distributing papers in our street early that morning. Perhaps it's the quarantine pass that the guard is talking about.
We went home and I grabbed the papers and started to read.
And yup, I was right...those papers are our "quarantine pass"
No...not "our"
It is the quarantine pass.
Only one per family is allowed to go out.
Written on the paper is the allowed time and the allowed days per week, of the person who is allowed to go out.
Seniors and kids are prohibited.
No doubt. My mom was the first to react.
Grocery shopping is her "therapy"
She quickly add that she don't look a "senior citizen"
Which is actually true.
Written on the back it says, a representative is allowed to go out every tuesday and thursday only between 9 am to 3pm only.
So, I have to squeeze all the things I needed to do in a week outside our home in 6 hours for 2 days.
Wow...felt like I am in a race or a challenge.
I felt like a prisoner too.
I quickly filled up the pass with my information
and kept it in my bag.
I know my mom would try to get it from me.
Reminding myself not to lose it
Or else, I wouldn't be able to go inside any establishment.
Yes... That was how it was like.
Suddenly... A quarantine pass became more precious than gold.
Even with gold, without the quarantine pass, I can't buy anything.
Who would have thought that a day would come when gold would lose its value over a piece of photocopied paper.
Even the richest wouldn't be able to shop for gifts without this magical pass.
Please God...make each minute longer than 60 seconds.
At 4:10am I sat up...and bowed my head.
I always pray after waking up.
I am not religious...
In fact, I have done a lot of unacceptable actions
But, I do know how to be thankful to the One who made me.
I went to the bathroom...took my favorite shampoo and washed my hair
I always wash my hair first.
I hate getting my feet wet...But I always enjoy taking a bath.
Every morning, I need to be in a hurry so my bath always take less than 20minutes
I always tell myself, I will enjoy my bath in the evening
I toweled myself and went to my closet
I choose my clothes depending on my mood.
I love pink , so my wardrobe is full of pink hues.
While choosing what top to wear, I suddenly wonder
Where is my mom? Is she sick? Why is she not calling me for breakfast?
I wore a baby pink shirt and loose white pants.
It's my "In a hurry outfit"
I then went to the kitchen to see that the lights are still off....
Is my mom sick? Is my dad still asleep? Aren't they going to have breakfast?
I opened the lights and made some coffee.
I wanted to eat some bacon and eggs but It would take time to fry
So, I just settled for some buttered toast and my favorite cereal with lots of milk.
While I was thinking whether to wake up my mom and dad or just let them sleep
Our dogs barked loudly...
Feels good that someone's awake other than me.
Someone's at the gate. Two men
Should I open the door?
I took a peek....our neighbor was talking to one of them
I opened the blinds and the man turned around.
He saw me peeking.
I had no choice so I opened the door.
He introduced himself as someone from the local government.
He gave me forms that we should fill up
He said "Ma'am kindly fill this up for you and your parents....In the afternoon, we will collect them
these forms are for your quarantine pass"
I didn't know what to say...I was shocked to hear the word "quarantine"
While my thoughts are running, I took the forms and said thank you
I still can't get over the word "lockdown"
Now, I have to deal with "quarantine"
Then it hit me...my mom and dad are not sick.
They are still asleep at 6:00 am
Because there's no reason to get up early
All the offices are closed...including mine.
We are stuck at home....
We are on quarantine...
Damn....I shouldn't have washed my hair
Now, it's so wet I can't lie down and go back to sleep
I don't want to sleep with my hair still wet
and my pillows will get wet too
I cramped my brain with useless thoughts
I focused my worries on my damp hair
I can't go back to sleep.....
I turned on the TV and finished my breakfast
I settled myself
I calmed myself
I tried my best not to overthink
Because I am starting to panic
What am I going to do?
I am stuck at home
With no job...well I have
But I don't know how to work at home
I am programmed like a robot
That at that hour I am supposed to be on the bus already
On the way to my office
Checking my phone for important messages
But, that routine suddenly cracked whole
Instead, I was at the kitchen munching my toast
Thinking what to do...
I sipped my coffee...It's gone cold.
Even my coffee frustrates me.
My toast got too much butter
But it taste bland...should I add some jam?
I remembered we ran out of jams too.
We really should go to the grocery.
It's monday but it feels like a weekend.
I should be happy
But I wasn't. My thoughts are clouded with worry.
I checked the time.... It's past 8:00am and my mom and dad are still sleeping.
I better just change back to my pajamas.
I feel tired from thinking too much.
Or am I sick? Do I have covid?
I think the first symptom of this corona virus is paranoia.
I changed to my PJs and went back to sleep.
What's the point of staying up anway for the first day of my pandemic life.
I thought of the photo I took of the black dog I have been feeding at a mall near our house. She sometimes stares in space... Thinking perhaps of what's going to happen tomorrow.
I am doing the same... While staring at my bedroom's ceiling.
We arrived at our favorite Supermarket 15 minutes before their closing time. And, it took us less than 10 minutes to stay inside (including going to the restroom) and get back to our car. It's a record breaking for my mom because her normal grocery shopping takes an hour or more. It's her therapy. She loves looking at each item...reading it's package - such as it's nutritional information, ingredients, etc etc. (yes she spends time doing that ) than reading a magazine or newspaper.
My dad didn't have a hard time finding a parking space. The lot is almost empty. It's odd because it's a Sunday. In a normal Sunday night, the Supermarket is full of people till it's closing time. But, that particular Sunday was different. I almost believed I was dreaming and having a nightmare. My dad was shocked when we met him at the exit door just a few minutes after he parked the car. "Did they close early", he asked. My mom quickly answered him with " everything's sold out except for some candies and dishwashing liquids" even the meat section is empty.
My mom began to panic. She remembered aside from not having enough bottles of alcohol at home we also don't have any facial masks or surgical masks. We were not equipped. If we were in a battle, we didn't have any weapon with us except for a small knife. I then suggested that we should pass by one of the 24 hour convenience stores on the way home. Perhaps they have bottles of alcohol. Usually, they price their goods higher than grocery stores, so maybe people would have second thoughts to purchase more than one bottle from there.
So, we stopped at the gas station where there's a 24hr convenience store and I went inside only to see a sign at the cashier that says "no alcohol available". I went back straight to the car and my dad suggested we should check other convenience stores on the way home. I went to two more convenience stores only to get nothing...not even the smallest bottle of alcohol.
On the way home, nobody's talking. We were all lost in thoughts. We were supposed to have a relaxing dinner after going to church and buying what we need (and want) for a week at the Supermarket...But here we are, doing some "Grocery hopping" and searching for a bottle of alcohol on a Sunday night.
We saw a small pharmacy a few minutes away from our home. We parked in front. And, just as I was about to enter the door, a staff asked me "are you going to buy alcohol?" I said, yes, please. How many bottles do you have? She said, "already sold out. But we, can pre-order for you. It might arrive after 5 days." I said , oh thank you. I think I will just try another store."
I feel like we didn't accomplish anything. So, I politely asked my dad if we could pass by a mall 30minutes from our house, where there's a stray cat I am regularly feeding. They said, it's okay. They don't feel like going home yet either.
It's already 10:00 in the evening. And there she was...waiting for me. She knows I always have something for her.
At least, there is one soul who is not panicking and worrying....anxious of what is going to happen next and desperate to find a bottle of alcohol.
It was 6:00 in the evening when we arrived at our favorite grocery store. We saw the long line going to the entrance door and my dad dropped us near the end of the line, telling us to just call him when we are done with our shopping. The guard told him that the parking lot is already full so he had to go around to find a space where he could park our car.
The line was long but it was moving. In less than 5 minutes, we were able to get inside. I reminded my mom to go straight where the Ethyl alcohols, hand sanitizers and other anti bacterial stuffs are placed. My mom dislikes Isopropyl saying it dries the skin so we always buy Ethyl alcohol. But...we did not find any except for few bottles of mild and scented hand sanitizers for kids.
My mom told me to go find a staff and ask if they have any alcohol left in their stock room. She was guessing that in a few minutes, a staff would refill the shelves. I think that was also the moment of truth - we came to realize that whatever was happening and being talked about was not a joke.
Seeing empty shelves in a grocery store is not normal. Few items were left - Biscuits, chips, noodles, canned goods and even toilet papers were all gone. People tripled the amount of items they usually buy as soon as they heard from the news that there is going to be a lockdown the next day - that means we all must stay at home.
Halfway to the customer service, I overheard some people talking in panic voices...."all alcohol brands are sold out". I walked faster and asked the first person in the customer service counter when are they going to have stocks of alcohol. She said, she don't know....probably tomorrow or the next day. I began to panic. I did a quick inventory - we have a 150ml bottle at home, a small hand sanitizer on my bag and my mom has one or two small bottles kept in her travel bag. That's all we have and it is not enough.
Instead of going back to meet my mom, I went to the drugstore just beside the grocery store. But, I didn't have to go inside - on its door was a white paper with "No alcohol available." written on it. Just as I was about to go back to the grocery store and meet my mom, I heard my phone ringing - it was her. She told me to meet her in front at the exit door. She wants to go to a supermarket we also frequently visit. She said maybe they have still have stocks of alcohol. But, we should hurry before they close. My dad was already waiting at the exit door and immediately drove away as soon as we got inside the car.
I have never imagined in my entire life, that this day would come....when alcohol would become too hard to find...too necessary and that it would become as precious as gold.
After hearing the news that there's going to be a lockdown in the whole city and other parts of our country, my parents and I immediately rushed to the parking lot and jumped inside our car to go to the grocery store.
My dad who normally drives fast...drove faster this time. My mom, hurriedly turned on the radio and listened intently to the news...shusshing us everytime we create a sound. I on the other hand, took my phones (I got 3 phones for 3 different service providers ) and checked my messages.
Not making a noise was not easy...especially after getting several text messages and a call from my co-worker that our office would be closed indefinitely. We would have to work at home. I began to panic.
What? Seriously? How can that be? What about my scheduled meetings and other appointments? What about those documents I personally need to hand to the authorized person? And, other than my day job, I also work as a College Professor. I need to see my students. I need to teach in person.
How in the world can I do those two jobs of mine which both requires face to face meetings in the comfort of my home? The Wifi connection is unreliable too. We have very slow if not the slowest Wifi connection in the world. I felt like suddenly my hands are tied and I couldn't do anything about it.
Hearing that we would have to work at home shocked me more than the news that there is a deadly virus around me and that there is no vaccine yet to prevent it.
For many years, since I graduated college, everyday I wake up at 4:30am to have breakfast, feed my pets, take a bath and go to work. I work till 9:00pm and I normally arrive home between 10:30-11:00pm depends on traffic especially if it's a Friday
I have lived a hectic life. I embraced stress like a pillow. I succumbed to the thought that it would be impossible to live without stress.
I always thought 24 hours is not enough to do everything I needed to do in a day. I eat fast, I walk fast, I do my work quickly and efficiently and I talk to people fast enough to convey what I needed to say. I know my family and friends hated me for that, and I feel sorry but there are so much work to do. I love my furbabies (my pets) more than my life sometimes and I provide all their needs but I rarely get to play with them.
It was Sunday and officially the start of my pandemic life.
As my worries start to pile up, my dad told us we have arrived at the grocery store. Apparently, my mom too was busy on her phone. And, as we both looked up... We were shocked to see how long the line was towards the entrance door.
Covid-19 forced me to stay at home and stop working for a while.
Right now, I have time to check my 8,000 plus e-mails (seriously) and chat with my friends.
During our conversations, some of my friends who are K-drama and K-pop fanatics
bombarded me with questions about Korea.
I honestly don't mind. I've worked as a Goodwill Ambassador of Korean Tourism last 2007 and 2008.
I love the country. So, it's natural for me to speak good things about Korea.
But in another chat room with friends and acquaintances together,
Some of them told me that while they are K-drama fanatics, they have bad impressions about Korean people.
Here are some of their impressions:
1. Korean people are racists.
My friends heard that Koreans don't like "poor-looking-dark-skinned-flat nose- short-people". I heard this too plenty of times. But, for the past 13 years, I haven't met any "racist" Korean yet. I met hundreds of Koreans and some of them are my friends and I am glad none of them are racists.
I am not saying they are not racists. I just haven't met one. If ever there are Koreans who are racists, I think they are being racists not because they are Koreans but because that's their character. They think of themselves as " highly superior" than other people. They want to feel good by insulting others. This character is not limited to Koreans. You can meet a racist person anywhere.
2. Koreans are rude to foreigners.
Korea is always in the list of top favorite destinations of tourists, so this impression is absurd. I myself wouldn't come back to Korea again and again if they are rude to foreigners like me.
Actually, it is safe to get lost in Korea because there would always be someone who would help you find your way. They are polite and helpful.
In my experience, they are not "extremely" friendly but if you smile at them, they would smile back. Sometimes, they are misunderstood as "snobbish" when in fact, they are just shy to talk to foreigners because some can't speak English well. This doesn't mean they are being rude. Also, isn't it a natural reaction to be careful of people you just met?
3. Koreans are violent and harsh people especially the men.
I am not sure about this because I haven't met any "violent" Korean yet.
Korean men may not always "open the door" for ladies and allow them to go first....but this doesn't mean they are not gentle at all.
My friends got this bad impression from K- drama scenes where a Korean man would slap the lady or hit the back of her head or pull her strongly. What you see in the drama doesn't always happen in real life.
My friends asked me if it's not "scary" to travel alone in Korea. I said "definitely not".In fact, I highly recommend Korea to solo travelers. Because, not only are people nice but it is also one of the safest country I know. It is safe to roam around even at night. Plus...good food are everywhere if you happen to be a "foodie"
If you'll ask me if they're all nice and good people? Of course not! Expect that bad people are everywhere. But so far, I haven't met a "bad person" yet in Korea and I was never treated badly.
4.. Korean ladies don't eat to stay slim.
Most of my Korean friends are ladies and they all love to eat. I learned from them that it is possible to stay slim and still eat 3x a day.
Their secret? They move and walk a lot.
If you're going to take the subway, you really need to walk and go up and down the stairs a lot (although you can choose to take the elevator or escalator).
Most Koreans take the subway when going to and from work to avoid traffic and it's the fastest, cheapest and easiest way to go from one place to another. Walking towards the station and transferring to another train burns a lot of calories.
Another tip is they eat healthy. Aside from eating lots of veggies and fruits, they eat Kimchi and they drink Barley tea almost everyday - these two helps in controlling weight by speeding up the person's metabolism.
Plus, a lot of Korean ladies now are into Yoga and Pilates.
You want to say something about your day
or share how you feel
But you do not want to chat with anyone
You just want to write it on your page
to blurt out whatever it is that's been on your mind
Go ahead post it!
You want to write a comment on things you find
interesting, cute or funny
and you want to share that on your page
so your friends could laugh with you
Or you are outrage about some news you read in Facebook
and you want to get that anger or frustration out of your chest
Or you are just simply curious about something that catches your eye
Go ahead, write it! Your opinion matters
You found your meal too lovely to eat
so you took a photo to appreciate its beauty
and you want to show it to your friends
to give them an idea what to try next
Go ahead, upload it and share!
You are in a nice place but you are alone
and you want to meet up with friends nearby
catch up with them while you have time
or perhaps you are hoping to find a date
Go ahead post your current location
You are in a relationship
and you love taking photos when you're together
and you want to share it on your Facebook or Instagram
because you want to share your happiness
and to save those photos
so you have something to look back a year from now
Go ahead, post those sweet photos!
You are browsing your news feed
and you read a nice life quote
and you want to share it on your page
but afraid your FB friends might think you are talking about them
Go ahead! it's fine!
In fact, you might be helping someone by sharing it!
You went shopping and you bought plenty of nice stuffs
so you took a photo to share to your friends
your recent haul and where you bought them
You are not bragging.
You just want to share what you found in the mall
Girls love to talk about shopping
So, go ahead post it!
You went on a trip and you took hundreds of photos
From the moment you boarded the plane
up to the moment you're saying good bye to your tour guide
and you want to upload all those photos in an album
to serve as your "online hard disk"
and to share it to your friends
so they'll all see that you had a good time
and you have a skill in photography
Go ahead, post all those photos!
Girl, it's okay to post because it's your page!
As long as you're not being rude or nasty
As long as you're not insulting anyone
As long as you're not using photos that are not yours
As long as you're being honest and not pretending
Go ahead, enjoy your page. It's yours!
Expect that there will always be someone who will get jealous
Expect rude comments
Expect wrong judgment
Because some people are forgetting what respect is all about.
They are forgetting that they are just mere audience of your page
and they don't have any right to misjudge you.
Some people forget that there is such a thing as an unfollow button
IF they don't like what they see you on your page
If they hate seeing you on their newsfeed
Remind them that nobody's forcing them to follow you
There are people who don't like you
but are always watching you
Because deep inside, the are curious about you
So if I were you, only accept people who truly loves you
who acknowledge you for who you are
Get rid of those jealous people
You don't need a lot of friends
You only need few good ones
Hundreds of likes are nice
But a sweet comment from a friend is nicer
I used to hate rainy days
I hate it when rain drops on my head
And my feet get wet as I walk on damp roads.
But now the sound of rain comforts me
I now prefer the cold damp weather
Over this hot and humid summer
I used to hate waking up early in the morning
But now I enjoy getting up just minutes after sunrise
I think it’s the best time of the day
When everything is quiet except for this tiny bird
that often visits my window
Yes I think I enjoy my time when I am alone
Not that I hate company…
I just enjoy quiet mornings more often now than before
I used not to like hot coffee or even warm.
I live in a tropical country so I prefer to drink something cold
But now, a cup or two or maybe even three of hot coffee completes my day
I like how it warms my hand whenever I am holding a cup
And I like how a warm cup comforts me when I am feeling down
You say coffee is not healthy. You say caffeine is bad
But if it can make me smile... I wouldn't mind.
I used not to like the color red.
I used to say it is my least desired color
But these past few years, as I look at my travel photos
I came to realize I have been wearing plenty of red attires
So better not say no to a color
until you have tried it on and looked at yourself in the mirror
I used not to like snails. Oh how I hate seeing them in our garden
Then one day, my big dog spotted a very small snail
Just as he was about to crash it with his big paws
I grabbed the snail with my bare hands
I didn’t think twice. In fact, I didn’t think at all.
I just know I have to save that tiny snail
And now that snail is bigger than my hand
Safe and having the best life in a corner I made for him
Or her?
I used to hate it whenever you cross my mind
I used to stop myself from worrying about you
Because you forgot me for a long time
And it breaks my heart
But now I smile when I think about you
I laugh at our memories when we were young
I know i will always care about you
You are my friend after all
I might not agree with you sometimes
I might not like the way you live now
I might not readily accept the new you
But it is still you.
We might forget to keep in touch again
We might be too far away from each other
But this one I am sure... when you need me
I will come and help you
And fight anyone who will go against you
photo credit to the owner of this photo
I guess it's true
The more you hate...the more you love
2017 was a difficult year
But it was not harsh
It was challenging
But not bad
I was exhausted
But not restless
It was stressful
But I survived
I met danger few times
But I managed to escape
When a dreadful thing came
And I lost someone very dear
I did not cry. I remained calm.
It was very painful. But I found comfort.
Just when I thought nothing good was happening...
Amazing and wonderful surprises came.
They were beyond my imagination.
I’ve been to places I only see in dreams
I’ve seen things that are out of ordinary
Those things are as bright and colorful as a rainbow
But I only smiled because I saw my special one
He made everything beautiful and magical
I know I don’t deserve these or maybe I do
But it is true...Dreams do come true
Good things always happen when I least expect it
When I was about to give up
Help came at my side.
And when I think about it
I was never alone
I was never lonely
I was never lost
I always find my way
So 2017, thank you for making me braver
I am stronger now than before
You left me very exhausted
I almost couldn’t stand up
Yet I survived with a grateful heart
2017 left a week ago.
It came too fast
And left too soon
I had a hard time catching up with him.
But I did my best. I gave my best.
I dont have any regrets
But it left me exhausted.
It was a very challenging year for me.
It was difficult. A little harsh.
It pushed me to try harder
To protect what I have and those who I love
To get what I want, I worked harder
I planned better
I loved deeply
I cared a lot
I stayed while others walked away
And when things failed, I did not give up.
When people told me it’s impossible and there’s no hope...i still tried.
Until...I had no strength left
I found myself on the floor
Weak and exhausted.
Most of my plans did not work
My efforts were useless
My best was not enough
I tried but i failed.
God’s plan prevailed.
No matter how much I love
How much I care
All I have are not mine
God owns everything and everyone
From now on I need to constantly remind myself that He is generous enough to lend me things and people I need in my life.
I love them too much, I always forget I don’t own them.
So when God takes them back one by one, I feel betrayed.
Painful...but what can I do?
I only borrowed my life too.
And though I try so hard, I have no control of what’s going to happen.
I can only hope and pray
For God to allow me to be with them longer.
From now on, I will cherish each day I’m with them.
I will appreciate and love them more.
Am I giving up my dreams? Maybe for now.
I am too tired to plan again.
It will be up to God anyway. He always win.
My efforts are nothing.
I don’t know what 2018 has for me.
Am I hopeless? No I am not.
I am wishing for something good.
But God's plans are greater than mine.
2017 almost took my life away.
But I wasn't ready then to let go.
If God will ask me now if i’m ready to go?
Yes, I am ready.
I already gave my best in everything.
I have nothing left.
Only patience to wait...
10 years ago I made a wish
I sat on my bed and prayed
I asked God an impossible thing
To meet you...someday
And that someday arrived in a few days
I did not wait too long
God must be beside me when I made that wish.
Maybe I did something good
Maybe God is pleased
Maybe God wanted me to be happy
Maybe He wanted to show me what He can do
Whatever His reason...meeting you was and is the happiest moment of my life
10 years ago I loved you
Today...I still do
And I thank God that though not often...
I can see you every now and then
10 years from now
Only God knows what will happen
Maybe we will be together
Or far from each other
Maybe you will forget me
Or will still remember me
10 years from now
Maybe God has already answered my wish today
To hold your hand...to stay beside you
And be with you everyday
Though you made me cry a hundred times when you came
You made me smile a lot
You made me laugh hard
I played, I jumped, I ran as fast as I could
I sang my favorite songs
I danced like crazy
I left my work undone for the person I love
Yup this year...I stopped and smelled the roses and it felt good!
Though I got a handful of heartaches and failed many times
You sent me surprises
Gifts beyond my imagination
I cried a lot this year...
But my heart is glad
I will miss you 2016
When you came, they say you'll be bad to me
I say you weren't really bad
You are my good but tough friend
You want me to stay strong
To be different yet kind
Thanks for all the hope and love you left in my heart.
I will always remember you
Please tell 2017 to be extremely good to me too.
