Monday, April 28, 2014

Blood is not always thicker than water

Maturity caught me off guard.
Though, I am not ready yet
Growing old is something I cannot avoid
No wall is big enough to hide me
Sometimes I find chances to hide.
Doors for quick escape.
Then suddenly, challenges will come like rain
and I am not spared from the pain.





It is true. Growing old makes you wiser.
I prayed for wisdom. I gain more knowledge.
I learned that truth is powerful.
and that a lie has its own life. It soon will die.
I learned that you do not have to answer back to a lie
and you do not need to prove what is true
Truth is bound to win.
Though, truth often is scary

I learned that everything changes.
Nothing remains the same. Even in a family.
A good person can do something bad.
A friend might become an enemy.
And an enemy can become a friend
Other than my parents, I will trust no one.
My Creator knows my fears.

There will always be someone who will betray you.
I have been betrayed before. Again, today.
Hard to accept when it is done by your family
Because they are important to me
I protect them. I fight for them.
I am loyal to my family.
Sadly, not all of them feels the same way

It is possible that the person who is hugging you,
is the same person stabbing you at the back
Hearing "I love you" is precious to me
I didn't know that it also means "I hate you"
Easy to say. I hear it many times.
Too much that it loses its meaning.
It is better not to talk anymore.

I learned that the person who praises you
can be the same person who will ruin you
Insults thrown at me will return to her
Cousins, Aunty or Uncle...they are all the same.
They are all humans. They love you
But also capable of hurting you.

Not everyone will like me.
Not everyone will accept me.
Even if we have the same blood
Blood is not always thicker than water
And family is not bound by blood
It is bound by love and trust

A person who is there when I am in trouble
Who will comfort me when I am crying
Who will defend me like a friend
Who will believe in me and really care
Who will protect and truly love me
I will call that person my family.

Though I am hurt and betrayed
I can still forgive but I will not forget
I will always love but not like before
I will give them a smile and
If they hugged me, I will hug back
I will still love. But in my mind, I now know that
There are people worth keeping and worth leaving



*I don't own the photos. credits to the owner.



































Tuesday, December 31, 2013

THANK YOU 2013! I will miss you!

2013 is my best year since 2007
I waited 6 long years...
For blessings to come again
and they came like rain

I shed buckets of tears
and almost gave up
I felt weak and tired
To hopeless to stand up

2013 made me cry a lot
But it made me smile everyday
I had more laughs
and sweet memories to remember

2013 gave me time to travel a lot
I learned new things
I met new friends
I met my old friends again

2013 showed me what true love is
It is not learned and cannot be forced
Must not be out of pity or friendship
2013 brought me few steps closer to it

2013 gave me time to set my priorities
"work" is the last thing on my list
I hugged those I love while I can
I do not want to have regrets again

2013 is truly memorable
Though you gave me pains
You were good to me




Just like 2007...

I will miss you terribly








Monday, December 30, 2013

Wrong Door

I love kids. I really do.
I find them cute, funny and always happy.
They talk openly and they seldom lie.

I never see myself as a teacher
But If ever I would become a teacher
I would love to teach kids

On my way to finding the right path
A door was opened for me
I bravely entered it

I did not think twice.
I did pray but did not wait for answer
I got the shock of my life.

I love kids but not older kids
To be called "professor" sounds weird to me
By people just a few years younger than me

They cheat and they lie
They say bad words in classroom
I can count those who are polite

To talk in front of many strangers
Is not a dream come true
I entered the wrong door

I have to find the exit soon
But while I am still here
I will cherish the moment

I will remember few students
showing good manners and politely listening
Those who will turn their back to say thank you

I will give this job my best
For God and not for any body else
I will bear the pain for now

I will continue traveling this road
Until I find the right door
Surely, God will lead me there




A Quarantine pass is more precious than gold (a continuation to my first morning of pandemic life)

After my nap, my mom asked me to accompany  her to the grocery store to again find some alcohol, canned goods and frozen food to help us ...