My Life My Race

My Life My Race

Thursday, May 31, 2012

MY LIFE AND MY CAT PART 4 ( Dear God, WHY?!)



Dear God,

You can read my thoughts and you can see everything...
I cannot hide anything from you...
I do not have to explain why work became my last priority...
I do not have to justify why I no longer work for success...
I work only because I have to. You will hate me if I'm lazy...
But, I no longer compete...
I am content with what I have...
I have my parents...
I have Snowball...
I am happy...
Everyday is a blessing..
I can breath. I can play...
I feel complete...




Friends and relatives betrayed me...
They never know what loyalty means...
I don't even know if they can really love...
I don't need them anyway...
I have Snowball...
He is my best friend...
I can survive each day because of him...
Trials come and go. They hit me like waves...
and I stand firm with him on my side...
I sometimes cry but then he will look at me,
and I will be reminded of your love...
Snowball reminds me of you all the time...
How loving and faithful you are...
When I look at Snowball, I see good and perfect things...
which only you can give...
I don't feel lonely anymore...



I am happy...I was happy
Then suddenly, you changed everything...
You took my happiness
What did I do wrong?
Did I make you unhappy?
Are you mad at me?
Why do you have to take Snowball away?
Why did you make him sick?
I took care of him...
You saw it with your own eyes...
Why take him away?
Do you need him?
You own everything...
and I only have him...

I never expected you will hurt me like this
I thought you will never betray me
I trusted you...
But what can I do? You are God and I am just a human...
Who am I compared to you...
Who am I that you should care for?

You gave my old life back...
Which I did not ask for...
How can I live my life now?
Tell me, because I don't know how...
You already changed my heart...
Without Snowball, I am alone...
Without him, I lost my purpose
He is my parents'apple of the eye...
our pride and joy
and you took him away...

WHY?

Can you hear me crying? Can you see my tears?
You know everything...You know how I feel...
I cannot understand what happened...
I thought you gave him to me...
Because you wanted him to be with me...
Because I am better when he is with me...

Did you send him only to change me?
I cannot remember borrowing him from you
I asked him from you...
You are the one who gave...
Now I know your power to take...
In just a blink of an eye...Snowball is gone

I will never understand...
But though I feel betrayed, I will still trust you
You are God and I am just a human...
Even I belongs to you...
You run my life according to your will...

I don't know how to live my life now...
I don't know how to start again...
When you see me smile, don't think that I am happy...
I can laugh but don't think that I am glad...
I can pretend because I am human...

I miss Snowball so much...
I am still thankful that he knows I love him...
I cannot understand what happened...
But this I hope...
That someday, when my turn comes...
for me to leave my loved ones

...
You will comfort them...and not leave them unanswered...

I don't know why...I don't know the reason
Perhaps you need Snowball too...
Perhaps you miss him too...
He is yours anyway...now I know...
Thank you Lord for sharing him to me...
He made me happy...It was the best four years of my life...

Dear God,
Can I see him again?
Will you bring me to Heaven?
Will you forgive me?
This I hope and pray
Let me see Snowball again
To run with him...
To play wit him...

This time...forever







Wednesday, May 16, 2012

MY LIFE AND MY CAT PART 3 (Dear God, I found a best friend)

Dear God, My mornings are always happy ever since Snowball came and I know it makes you glad when I smile in the morning He wakes me up everyday with a soft "meow" and a pat on my leg I open my eyes and there he is...staring at me with his cute face...asking for breakfast He is my best friend and my companion We read the Bible and pray together everyday We eat breakfast and dinner together We watch TV every night We read the newspaper every Sunday We play everyday We go on trips every holiday We sometimes fight and He knows how to argue But he knows how to say sorry too
He support me and I support him His enemies are my enemies I know he hates our neighbor's cat and he knows I hate my ex-friend He loves who I love He hates who I hate He is sad when I cry And I feel hurt when he's in pain He listens when I speak He loves it when I play the piano He knows when I am feeling cold and scared and sleeps beside me when I am sick He is my best friend But I am guilty of not being a good friend I feel sorry whenever I had to leave him and go someplace I feel bad when he wants to play and I am busy I feel guilty when he is calling me and I'm pretending not to hear because I am reading my e-mails He always understands me I am not always good to him but he still loves me Snowball is my faithful friend always loyal, always loving Where can I find another one like him?

Saturday, May 12, 2012

MY LIFE AND MY CAT PART 2 (Dear God... do you know what is my cat's favorite color?)

Dear God,

My life changed when Snowball came My selfishness took a back seat My proud self is no longer present I know you sent him to change me I rarely receive beautiful gifts
I say beautiful when it's a gift that can meet my need
I often receive many...and they are all wonderful to look at
But I don't need most of them
I am not fond of jewels but you gave me one... More precious than silver or gold
To give him the best care...is my everyday mission
You gave him to teach me how to be truly responsible.
If he can think...I want him to think good thoughts about me
If he can feel...I want him to feel loved by our family
For many years, I am the one receiving care
Now, I am the one who has to give it

In my hand is a life
My duty is to keep it breathing
I did my best to know the facts
Like...what to feed him or how often can I give him a bath
I have to know everything about cats


I bought him an orange blanket
He likes it!
My mom bought him an orange pillow
He loves it!
My friend bought him an orange ball
He jumped so high and hugged it!

No need to ask what is his favorite color... Yes Lord... now I know, cats have their favorites too. Rose is his favorite flower
Mangosteen and lanzones are his two favorite fruits
Lemon grass is his favorite mouthwash
Chicken is his favorite food and not fish

He is the smartest cat I know
He knows where to pee
He knows what not to eat
He knows where to find his toy
He knows how to please my mom He knows how to make my dad laugh and he knows what time to wake me up

Can't thank you enough for giving me a cat with a high IQ (to be continued)